Broken heart
I was going to blog about stuff from this weekend and catch up on stuff I missed from last week. But it all seems so vain and empty now.
I just came from the blog of a friend who ministered on Skid Row in Santa Clarita, CA. If you get a chance, go by and visit her blog. She really has a hold of truth and the heart of God in her passion for the broken. It shakes me to my core to think of what a self absorbed life I lead, thinking only of myself, of my family's happiness and well being, this air tight happy bubble where I blog about how perfect my life is. (it's not) Of what use am I?? I'm oblivious to the dying world around me. What about the broken heart of God. What about the broken people in my own town who need love. What about that? What can I do? God show me what to do.
As I read Miriam's blog I began weeping for the broken. I wept for God's broken heart. I also cried tears of gratitude to God that I am still able to weep. I want to FEEL more. I want to WEEP more. I want to know the things that break God's heart and be moved to take action.
I was talking to a friend today about all the activities and camps I have lined up for the kids this summer. What a waste! I wept again thinking how much more my kids would benefit from coming alongside and helping with something like one hope ministry - my parent's church's outreach to the inner city kids of Tulsa. But my mind reels to find something here, something local, something tangible that we can do. I've felt a tug towards Highway 80 rescue but I haven't been able to decide if that's wise or not. I need wisdom.
I had a glimpse of the broken heart of God tonight. I don't want to lose sight of that again. Lord help me to find my niche, my place to serve. Show me a way to get to the broken. I need to be there.
2 comments:
First off, you have a wonderful heart. You are where God has called you for this season. You have great kids and you and Tom are raising them to love the Lord and love the broken hearted. Second, it is not a waste to talk of camps. Again, it's your (our) season. Sending them to some of these camps, VBS and Bible camps, they are learning about the love of Jesus. They are also having fun and doing what kids do. You are getting a real deserved break that you need. Without proper rest, we cannot be what Jesus has called us to be. When you are doing soccer, you are ministering. Your attitude speaks volumes while there. The way your children react in soccer is an outreach. They have good attitudes and good sportsmanship. Wanting to go out into the world and help is a wonderful thing. I feel the same pull often. I feel I am not doing enough for God's kingdom. But remember as a mom who loves the Lord and who is training their kids in His love, you are furthering His kingdom more than you can ever imagine. Pray and help where God wants you to. Not where you want to. I love you girl! You are an inspiration!
Good questions. Keep seeking Him about what to do, and He'll show you. We need to pray about how we can bring our kids up to minister, not just receive, don't we!
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